Episode #5: Tiffany Gouché on learning to practice self-love and acceptance to create with an open heart

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“It’s my responsibility to be me.”

“The universe isn’t set up to harm you. It’s set up to help you.”

I sat down with singer, songwriter and producer Tiffany Gouché about the path she’s carving in her own time and sound.

We talk about the journey she’s been on, coming into standing in her truth as a queer black woman and defying stereotypes in the R&B and soul music space. We talk about how she’s come into her own artistry, from being part of the gospel choir to learning how to play piano and produce first before gaining courage to write and sing for herself as an artist and other artists like Lalah Hathaway. We talk about past traumas, including an incredibly poignant, sad memory Tiffany recalls that played a major role in why she didn’t initially pursue singing.

Tiffany talks about transforming negative self-talk and fears into self-love, acceptance, compassion and confidence through her reliance on her spirituality.

We talk about navigating through the noise on social media, the importance of being aware when the ego is running the show, taking time with your art and music to not make “microwave music” and ultimately creating from truth, love and an open heart.

This episode is a must listen for anyone searching for more confidence and trust within oneself. Thank you Tiffany for sharing your vulnerability and honesty.

Follow and listen to Tiffany at @tiffanygouche.

Photo credit: Rikkí Wright

Episode notes:

3:00 dark place of self-hatred and not accepting of who she was as queer

4:00: what turned around–Tiffany on giving stagnance and sadnesst o God, the journey of self-love begins

4:46: how growing up in a strict Christian church affected her being her true self; experienced God in her own ways

6:40: love yourself fully. You show how people you want to be treated by how you love yourself. It starts with you

7:05: How Pillow Talk and Fantasy were projects that represented her living her truth - a courageous act

8:26: Being talented and masculine-presenting in an industry of men feels like a threat

9:50: Pressures of social media -  it’s not about trying to be popular or in the forefront. If you don’t have nothing to say, it’s better to be quiet. There’s no rush

11:00: How her love for cooking came from her mom and family’s love for cooking - you don’t cook BS for people you love. It’s the same with music

12:00: How Tiffany was raised to love people as a whole through the way her parents encouraged her and her siblings to say “I love you”

12:34: Core message in Tiffany’s music is love

13:00: Discussion of the ego and how it gets in the way because of fear

14:49: “I wasn’t creating because I didn’t believe in myself...the more I start loving myself, the more I love my music more”

16:50: Tiffany realized she could do multiple things but first started off only wanting to produce beats

17:51: Tiffany’s traumatic experience that held her back from pursuing singing

20:50: How people mistaken her for a man and how she wants to encourage more queer artists to share their experiences

23:33: Tiffany talks about meaningful stories about connection and love from her fans

25:20: Things Tiffany are working on - being more trusting of the process. “The universe isn’t set up to harm you. It’s set up to help you.”

26:17: What Tiffany does to take care of herself on the daily

28:10: Tiffany’s gratitude list